


The meaning of roses

by SillyBilly (Patatarte)



Series: Spicy box [7]
Category: Cow Chop
Genre: Boys In Love, Flowers !, M/M, also there's Mishka Celia and Ein, and Aleks gets drunk, but also a blowjob, but cute, first chapter is just pure fluff, lots of kisses, puke, really messy one, second one is nsfw, they are hopeless idiots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-06
Updated: 2019-01-16
Packaged: 2019-08-19 13:28:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16535453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Patatarte/pseuds/SillyBilly
Summary: The first time it happened, it was for a bit. Aleks thought that adding a rose to his gift for their Amazon Prime serie would be nice. He bought it in a corner store before going to work, trying his best to hide it before they filmed.Of course, James' reaction was perfect and somehow expected. He took the rose, mouth agape, looking so surprised and touched by the gift. And then he suddenly slapped Aleks with it, yelling : "One ? That's it ? You cheap FUCK !".





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A reminder that english isn't my first language, so i make mistakes,  
> if you find one please tell me !  
> I hope you'll enjoy this !

The first time it happened, it was for a bit. Aleks thought that adding a rose to his gift for their Amazon Prime serie would be nice. He bought it in a corner store before going to work, trying his best to hide it before they filmed.

Of course, James' reaction was perfect and somehow expected. He took the rose, mouth agape, looking so surprised and touched by the gift. And then he suddenly slapped Aleks with it, yelling "One ? That's it ? You cheap FUCK !". Aleks laughed, weakly protecting himself, whining about not having more options for flowers earlier !

James kept the bit alive even after Aleks' item was done and over on the floor, mentioning it through the full video, even ending the recording on him hitting Aleks with what was left of the poor rose. They had to clean up their mess, and Aleks only took the petals off the floor, then the stem still trapped inside the plastic wrap. He chuckled to himself, still finding James' reaction from earlier funny. 

"Someone would have been so happy to get that single rose," he said to no one in particular, but James was around, shrugging, even if Aleks wasn't looking at him. He looked blankly as Aleks pocketed the petals, maybe because of the sweet smell. As the next recording took place, five minutes later, they both forgot about the rose.

 

Two days later, Aleks came to work tired. He streamed for a while during the night. It was fun, so he had no real regrets other than a really bad case of heavy eyelids. He went to his desk and froze. He squinted at two roses resting across the keyboard. He turned around for cameras or something, but he only saw Jakob having the worst sit of his life. That kid is ruining his back.

James wasn't at his desk but Aleks saw his car was in the parking lot. Well, he just needed to wait until he eventually had to confront the guy about the...gift. It was faster than expected as James came out of the bathroom at the same time Aleks sat down. James walked straight to him, at a quick pace.

Aleks didn't move the roses at all and eyed them slowly, admiring the soft colors. Not red, but a soft pink, getting darker in the inside of the roses. They smelled really nice, Aleks appreciated the change of smell in that damn warehouse. He still had to question James about them, as the man was standing next to him, arms crossed, looking more smug than he was probably feeling.

"See, two is better. It doesn't look as cheap." 

"James, two looks worse, it looks...miserable, it's not a single rose, it's not a bouquet...That's lame." He still had a smile saying that, because he appreciated the roses still. James, on the other hand, looked like a mix of emotions Aleks couldn't pinpoint before the man turned around to sit at his own desk.

Brett laughed at Aleks' face for having two roses on his desk but no one really said anything more, and the day went like...Any other day at the warehouse : hellish, but not that much. It's only when Aleks left for the parking lot with his two roses that James felt obligated to talk about them again. 

"Oh, now you like them ?" They always look for a way to pester each others, and Aleks held the flowers out of James' reach, afraid that it'd turn into another "smack-attack" from his friend.

"I never disliked them, dude, it's just that two is boring. It looks like a sad bouquet." It did look like the saddest bouquet. But taken individually, the flowers still looked nice and smelled good, so Aleks just took them home. 

Well, Mishka chewed on one when she greeted him, but that's still acceptable.

 

During the evening, Aleks was lying on his bed, listening to chill songs while scrolling on his phone. A faint blue neon light setting the mood. Both Mishka and Celia were on the bed with him, it was really nice and he felt himself drifting to sleep, drained from the day and his lack of decent sleep. But before that, he just looked at the single rose he had left. He found no better place for it than a dusty squiggly cup.

He smiled, content by that simple gesture. It was stupid, not useful for their work, and yet James just gave him flowers, against all odds. A sad bouquet, but still. He wondered for a second if he was in a situation needing a "go big or go home". He could easily do better, but when would it be enough ? Maybe James was over it already ? Aleks rolled on his bed, disrupting his pets for a second before everyone settled down once more. 

After a quick search on his phone for home delivered flowers, Aleks wondered where he should have them delivered. At James' place ? That'd be...A deep inside joke, a bit too personal maybe ? But the warehouse wasn't a better option, since it'd turn into a shit show, like most things there.

Aleks decided to find the answer by giving more attention to his dog, caressing her fur and talking sweet nonsense to her, making her roll on the bed, do tricks. When she jumped off the bed to get some water after those actions, Aleks finally decided. Deep down, and after he received the two roses from James, he wanted to do more. He never had the chance to really do that kind of stuff, offering flowers, delivering them, to someone he just...

He stopped typing on his phone to look up at the rose.

His mind buzzed, not giving him clear informations about what to do, what he wanted. He just looked at the rose and wondered if it meant anything or not. His mind really didn't help him find an answer and he almost canceled the flower delivery until he just felt his heart beating so hard that it decided for him. 

 

He didn't sleep much that night, anxiety took over his body for a good part of it, and then he just decided to go online and stream. It was a nice distraction for his mind and it worked pretty well for his soul, but not his body.

The sun pokes out of the horizon, and he feels like a vampire as the light hits him. He turns his back on it, checking his phone for the hundredth time. He almost canceled the flowers two times during the night, but he didn't. It's too late now, it's in motion. He can deal with it, right ?

Right.

He finally moved, walked Mishka, took a slow breakfast and then a cold shower to gain some sense. He drove to the warehouse for another big day. Not much for recordings, but serious talk about the business, stressful shit again. He had his head out of it most of the time, nodding and trying his best to follow.

Thanks god for Brett and his good brain, for everything. James also looked a bit lost at times, arms crossed again. It seems like a recent habit, and Aleks hates that he noted it rather than giving attention to Brett's speech.

It's only after some filming that Aleks goes to talk with James. They both filmed, but not together. Aleks takes advantage of their late meal's delivery to engage a conversation. It's just like every other day, but Aleks still feels the sting of anxiety messing his attitude and nerves. He plays a character rather than himself to fake confidence and James notices it, giving him a look but not insisting on it.

Aleks casually asks "No flowers today, uh ?" after he went out to get their meals from the delivery guy. James seems a bit surprised by the question, but then he takes a big bite of his sandwich, answering with a mouth full of bread and god-knows-why, just to spite Aleks, "If anything, it's your turn."

It is, and Aleks shrugs as if it's nothing, but he feels his heart beating too fast. It is not because of the energy drink from earlier, he's sure of that. They drop the subject and Aleks talks about shenanigans he had on stream the night before, having James casually calling him an idiot, but he smiles in his words.

The afternoon's recordings go smooth, and they wrap it up. Another day well done. And it's the weekend ! Perfect on all sides. James mentions a game he wants to play and will probably stream, Aleks isn't sure yet if he wants to stream or go out to change his mind. Brett offered him to come to a party with the boys, but he needs more time to decide.

So Aleks goes home, walks Mishka, looks at his phone, rinse and repeat. He's nervous, really nervous. The flowers should have been delivered by now, and there's no traces on twitter or anywhere. Not even a text ! Nothing. Fuck, maybe it's not arrived yet ?

He almost drops his phone when he receives a call from Brett. The question is dry, wanting a clear answer from him "Will you be there tonight or not ?". Aleks goes in his bedroom and looks at the rose, still flawless at the moment. He tells Brett that he'll be ready in two hours and hangs up.

 

Brett doesn't really say anything relevant to Khail, but he mentions that Aleks is being weird today, as the Russian downs another shot and won't dance like he usually does during these party nights. Khail asks Aleks if he's alright and gets a thumb up as an answer. Alcohol numbs him but doesn't make his brain stops, there's just slow thoughts going through him and, at some point, Brett even stops him from drinking more. 

What would be the point to black out anyways.

He doesn't know what to do with himself, calls an uber to get back to his place instead. He pets Celia who's sitting on a kitchen counter and looks at him with patience. He whispers to her, stupid things, doubts, dreams, the most idiotic thoughts going through his mind.

For a second, his mind and heart align. He pictures James receiving flowers, thanking the delivery guy and closing the door. He imagines him sighing in annoyance as he looks at the bouquet, probably knowing who it's from. He might giggle and talk to Ein about the stupidity of it all as he shuffles the bouquet to find the note.

Aleks really didn't think too far for the note, he just wrote "Now, that's a real bouquet, by Aleksandr". He took one of the prettiest bouquet, said to smell really good, with a mix of white, green and pink flowers. Sure, it's not roses anymore, but Aleks loved the bouquet enough to get out the rails. Well, they had no rails to begin with.

He really wants to think it was a nice surprise. He thinks James loved it, or at least laughed at the weird prank. No anger, probably not. Hopefully not. Aleks wonders what James did with the bouquet. Holding it while standing like an idiot, back against his door ? Or did he put it on his kitchen's counter ? Or the living room's little table for Ein to get a smell of it ? (and maybe chew it a bit)

Maybe if that will not change anything for the future. Aleks is just glad he offered a big expensive bouquet to his...friend. It's something warming his heart. Mhm, that or the alcohol doesn't go well with his stomach and he needs to puke.

 

He wakes up on his bathroom's floor, thankfully his face wasn't near the toilet bowl. No, he was curled up on the towel he used to dry himself off after yesterday's shower. Mishka and Celia are there too, Mishka is glued to him, giving him a soft and welcome warmth. He grunts trying to move, his muscles aching a bit now. Mishka licks his face and that alone puts more energy into his moves. Celia runs away from the room, probably to sleep on his bed, in peace. 

Aleks manages to sit on the toilet's sit, his phone still in hand. He passes a hand on his face, hard, then shuffles his hair before recollecting his memory.

The room moves a little around him, he's lucky it's not every single atoms moving right now. He exhales slowly and looks at his phone, for notifications and all that kind of shit. Of course Brett posted some pics of the night, but he ignores them to look at the text icon in the corner. The room spins a little more, he slides his ass off the toilet to fall hard on the floor, puking what is left of his night right in the toilet.

When he's done, calming himself and thanking his dog for licking his arm with care, he looks at the text closely. It's from the expected man, James, of course. Aleks almost wants to ignore it, but an impulse makes him want to click and be done with it as soon as possible.

"Better, tell me when you're awake."

Aleks frowns, but weirdly he doesn't really think further as he replies "Awake now" . He then locks his phone, promises Mishka that he'll walk her soon and almost crawls into the shower. He almost falls back asleep in there, the warm water cleaning all the disgusting bits and sweat from him. The room is still slightly spinning, but when he closes his eyes he sees a smile surrounded by flowers.

 

He can finally chill after that shower, the clean clothes, the long walk with Mishka. He is now sitting with his cat on his lap. He probably looks like a comic villain, but he doesn't care. He finally feels like he's back inside his body. He watches some youtube videos, enjoying some warm sun on him, piercing through the blinds.

But then, peace is disrupted. 

His phone rings and this time he drops it. Not too bad since his screen was already shattered. Celia runs away, scratching his legs in the process. He complains as he takes the phone off the floor and answers to James.

"Dude" He sounds surprised, because he is ! It's saturday, and in his free time James never calls anyone, or rarely. "You know we don't work today ?" He jokes with a hint of anxiety in his voice. He feels like this is related to everything and doesn't really want to have that talk on the phone, nor anywhere else.

"Come open that fucking gated place you live in !" James screams, and the fact that Aleks can hear him from two places at once, his phone and outside his window, is weird enough for him to look out for him.

He sees him, not really seeking the "why" more than the "how". James doesn't really like going out, even less on weekends, and especially not to Aleks' place. In fact, he's sure he only came here once !

"Just a second" is all Aleks says as he puts his phone on the counter and almost trips over his own feet to get to his shoes. He puts them on easily, grabs his phone and runs outside. Of course he regrets that, his body is better than earlier, but he still is a bit hangover !

He opens the gate, and is immediately greeted by a flower bouquet shoved in his face. And it's not the one he bought. Aleks has the reflex to grab it, and he's pushed further in as James enters the place with another bouquet in his hands, and also a leash, with Ein at the other end of it.

"Move !" James' patience is thin under the sun, and Aleks just obeys, going straight to his place, still holding a big bouquet of red roses. He doesn't have time to question it now as he opens his door and gets pushed inside again.

James curses and puts the bouquet he was holding on Aleks' car. It's gentle enough that Aleks says nothing about it, still confused about it all. He just looks as James takes the leash off Ein and lets her wanders around the expensive car.

"Dude, what the fuck ?" Aleks finally says, the bouquet against his chest, looking at James for any clue of what is going on exactly.

James sighs, mumbles that he went to buy flowers and came to deliver them. Simple, right ? He's not looking at Aleks, at all. It's awkward, in a garage like that, in L.A, with so many red roses ? It's really awkward, even for them.

"Dude, James, why so many roses ? How many are there anyways ?" Aleks laughs, nervous, not knowing if he has to invite him to go upstairs yet.

"Twenty." James looks at the bouquet he left on Aleks' car, touching the wrapping like it's the most interesting thing in the world.

"Roses are expensive dude, why so many ?" Aleks looks at the bouquet he holds, ten perfect red roses. Their smell is faint but sweet, he feels like he's drunk again. "Uh, want a drink ? Or something ?" He offers, not knowing what to do at this point, since James focuses on everything but him.

The "Mh" he gets in response is unsure, but he'll take it, ready to go, hearing Mishka being crazy at the door. But before he opens it, James says "wait !" grabbing and pushing the second bouquet against him, forcing him to hold everything. Aleks understands when he sees him grab Ein. She can get up the stairs, with lots of patience and difficulties, but James is too nice with her. She will get the fast transportation.

And so they ascend, trying not to trip on Mishka as she gets crazy excited and happy to see James and Ein. When Ein gets on the floor, the two dogs begin a dance, full with vocals, pitchy barks.

Aleks is just there, holding twenty damn roses, and James still won't look at him.

"James." Aleks shakes, decides to put all the flowers on his table, safer. James still won't look at him. "James !" A look, finally. "Why all this ?"

The question is weird, and to be fair, Aleks started it all. Somehow. In a way. James shrugs, mumbling again, but Aleks hears it as the dogs finally calmed down a bit. There's a bit of panic as he says "You started, asshole, I don't know", followed by a softer "Pretty flowers, right ?"

He tries to laugh it off, and Aleks does that, for now. Touching the wrapping and looking around him for anything that could hold twenty flowers. James is insane, they both are. 

"I don't think they'd fit in the squiggly cup like the last one." He puts his hands on his hips, thinking about the perfect place for them until he notices a piece of paper in one of the bouquet.

He looks at it intently, before looking back at James who has his "I don't know" face. So, of course, Aleks takes the note and read it. It's not James' handwriting, it's probably from the shop and just as a reminder, not something supposed to be left in the bouquet.

"20 roses, meaning : Believe me, I am sincere toward you," Aleks reads in a soft voice. He looks up again, his mind and heart are racing. James is shifting on his feet, hands shuffling. He looks ready to tell a joke as an apology and Aleks wants to scream.

Really, Aleks would love to move, to walk towards James, to ask more questions, because...Maybe he doesn't get it ? Maybe it's a friendship thing ? Maybe he doesn't get it at all ? He has a smile on his lips, but it wavers with the confusion. James walks up to him, small awkward steps, stopping next to him, not looking, not knowing what to do more than that. They are side to side and a second passes, two, three...Even the dogs stopped moving. This is awkward, so awkward, what does it mean ?

"James ?" Aleks is almost laughing in his confusion and surprise and everything else, he doesn't know what's going on, or doesn't realize anything. He doesn't want to believe and get disappointed.

A finger taps on his hand, a soft touch taking his breath away. Two fingers, trying to get in between Aleks' ones, weakly, shakily. Aleks looks nowhere, his eyes are on the wall in front of him, but he doesn't really look at it. He keeps having a weird laugh, awkward and awful. James is red, his face burning, but Aleks is in the same situation.

The fingers tangles themselves, and there's a tentative squeeze that Aleks mimics, shaking so much that it probably felt rude. They breathe again, out of rhythm, trying to get their hearts to calm down a little ! 

Aleks laughs, a full hearted laugh with a tear on the corner of his eye, he wipes it with his other hand and James giggles too, squeezing the hand again.

"Your hand is so sweaty" James complains with a small voice, but he adds a "Mine's too", brushing the sweat out of his head with his free hand.

They keep standing like two absolute idiots for a while, not looking at each others, squeezing their hands from time to time, while having stupid smiles, watching their dogs lazily lying on the floor now.

James mumbles again, saying "fucking idiot, just a fucking idiot" and Aleks doesn't know if it's directed to himself or not. The sweet holding hands is broken as James moves, fast and a bit tense. He faces Aleks then, looking at him in the eyes, red as a lobster, frowning and looking angry.

Aleks feels tiny then, doesn't make any move, just shakes a bit, waiting for anything to come. James grabs Aleks' foreharms, a bit too tight, but Aleks says nothing, notices the tension in the grasp.

"I kissed girls, you kissed girls, fucking come on, it's no different !" 

This time, Aleks is pretty sure James is talking to himself. He doesn't have time to say anything back that James' head gets really close to his, his hot breath against his skin. There's another string of curses from James just before his lips touch Aleks' ones. It's... Awful. Too tense and shaky, like a first kiss ever ! James is really bad at this, and so Aleks decides to take the lead, just for that.

He slightly pushes James with his palms against the man's chest, trying not to be bothered by his own actions. Then, as they look at each others, Aleks reassures James with a smile, a smirk even, as he slides one hand behind James' neck, really enjoying the hair there, caressing even. James stopped moving, his eyes looking into Aleks' ones, seemingly more calm, waiting, still red and breathing heavily, but at least he stopped mumbling.

Aleks tilts his head a little, still shaking and close to a heart attack. He looks as James closes his eyes, waiting, not making that awful puckered lips, he's decent. Aleks gets closer and almost jumps as James' hands go and rest on his hips. He really feels like he's going to explode, or implode, or everything at once. He wants that moment to last forever, but he also has little control over himself as he closes the gap. 

Immediately after it's done, and they just won't let go of each other, James pushes him until his back is against a wall (well, in that case, his fridge) and gets closer, as close as he possibly can, feverish. Aleks really doesn't try to moan, but does it, and James moans back, making his whole body shake at the sensation.

All they needed to get to this was one stupid lonely flower ? Really ?  
If Aleks knew this, he'd have offered one to James a long time ago.


	2. Red means passion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, at last !  
> I hope you will like it,   
> I apologize it took me forever to finish it !

Aleks exhales shakily, opening his eyes and gathering his thoughts, feeling really weak. His under belly is giving him all sorts of signals. It’s really weird because James is a long time friend, someone he did all kind of bullshit with ! And now, he has one of his hands against his neck, his fingers almost digging into his skin and hair, his lips lazily caressing James’ ones. It’s just...He doesn’t think straight, feels the room turn again, holds on James’ arm to not...fall.

It’s too much at once, and James makes a small pitchy sound, surprised, his hands so firmly grasped on Aleks’ hips it starts to hurt. They would love to joke, to meme, to say some bullshit as always, from that fresh time, when they were friends/weird brothers, but now ? 

James pushes a bit more and Aleks shivers because his back is flushed against the cold refrigerator now. James is so warm it’s becoming unbearable. Aleks can feel himself sweat from all the nervosity and action, feeling gross but not wanting James to let go.

He has to pushes James before he blackout or something, breathlessly saying : “James, I need to sit”, his voice so whiny and pitchy it makes him cringe.

Thanks god, James understands and takes a step back, his hands just a little less heavy on Aleks’ hips, but still here to support him. It feels too cold then, and they both only realize that their dogs are at their feet, trying to understand what the hell is happening between them by tapping their little paws on the floor like crazy.

Aleks gives a breathless laugh at the sight, really feeling weak and making small steps towards any surface able to hold his ass. James helps him by walking backward, taking ungraceful steps, holding tight. To be fair, Aleks still hasn’t let go of James’ neck either, wanting his hand to stay there for as long as he’s allowed. He reluctantly does let go when he sits on a bar stool, his hand going on the table top instead, everything slowly becoming less spiny. 

Aleks sighs, recollecting himself. James is still close but not touching him anymore, at all. He’s giving a look at Ein, who barks and whines and casually gets a bit mad at Mishka. If the dogs weren’t there, it’d have been awkward really fast.

But, even if looking at dogs is fun, the lack of touch gets quickly unbearable for Aleks who looks up, seeking a reaction from James. He’s giving him the puppy-eyes until he looks back at him. Of course when James does, he sighs a little, and it could look like he is pissed off by the sight but Aleks knows better.

He might not know James’ reactions in that specific setting, but they are familiar enough to read each other with close accuracy. So Aleks slowly pushes his face against James’ shirt. It’s not as soft as it once was, not that Aleks knows about it, but James lost some weight. It’s still really comfy and intimate even if James smells a bit like sweat, but that’s understandable if you juggled with flowers, a dog and kissing a friend under Cali’s heat. 

“Your head is so sweaty, ew,” James says at the same time he takes a step forward, his arms closing around Aleks’ shoulders and his legs pushing a little to stay in between Aleks’ one. It makes everything perfect and stable.

“Dude” Is the only thing Aleks says, without thinking, like it’s an emotion by itself. He feels James’ laugh vibrating against his skin and he feels a wave of warmth taking him whole. He really just wants James at this point, in ways he only dreamed of on some strange days, deeply buried in his mind. 

James always was the friend he had a little crush on, but never even expected anything from.

When James’ hands gently and tentatively brush on Aleks’ shoulder and neck, Aleks feels like dying. He doesn’t want to be that guy, but he wants James, right now, wants him to do anything he wants to him. They can skip all the talk and shit, they know each other really well already and had some kind of dates together too. It’s not like he’s burning any step, they have done them all before.

“I think I want you.” Aleks feels his whole face burning, his skin deep red, trying to hide it by burying his nose against James’ shirt. His softness makes it worse. So Aleks suddenly pulls back, detaching himself from James to look up at him.

He expects a joke, a laugh, but there’s just James looking down at him, silent and questioning. It isn’t how they are used to be, this is foreign territory. James’ hands are scratching Aleks’ neck, trying to grab some hair there. A couple of seconds pass before James finally says a word after clearing his throat “Your room, I don’t want the dogs around”. It’s like a whisper but mixed with hot peppers, it goes right to Aleks’ crotch.

Aleks just nods, really feeling some alcohol residual but trying his best to look good as he gets off the stool and walks away, not looking behind him. His heart pounds hard in his chest as he opens the door to his bedroom. Two steps in and he stops, standing like an idiot with his eyes stuck on his bed. His mind is buzzing, even when James playfully fights with the dogs to keep them out and closes the door behind him.

It becomes quiet again, even if there’s two confused dogs barking on the other side of the door. It’s muffled enough, that room is like another world.

Aleks jumps a little when hands touch his shoulders. The long and shaky fingers are digging hard in his flesh and he does his best not to shudder. He fails when James’ warm torso fits perfectly against his back.“I’ve never done shits like that before, ever. I’ve never even touched a guy, I don’t know what to do” James confesses, his voice low, a bit whiny and too close to Aleks’ ear. It sounds a bit soft, confused.

“I’ll teach you” is all Aleks responds, a bit blankly, swallowing his saliva and still looking at his bed like it is the weirdest thing in the world right now.

He wants this, wants anything offered and proposed. Aleks knows what pleases James, in theory, and he shivers at the idea. He has tons of mental images in his brain, he can replace every dude he fooled around with James, easily. But he knew nothing about these guys except that they wanted him and he wanted them too, it was just lust, quick jobs, nothing close to what James and him are.

Still, Aleks would love for them to just...go past talk and awkwardness to just go into it, but it’s not as simple, and that part is also new for Aleks. 

He turns his head a little, still in James’ grasp, and tries to look at him. He doesn’t know how to do this without playing a bit of a character, but he thinks that it will ease everything. He plays characters all the time, it’s easier in the bedroom, to protect yourself, and if James understands it will be perfect. James doesn’t play any role at the moment, he’s really nervous and past the giggling phase. He’s a bit grossed out by Aleks’ shirt being damp with sweat but that’s familiar, he is familiar, they know each others.

“That’s so weird,” James blurts out, exhaling a humorless laugh. He looks around the room without really detailing anything, not until he spots the squiggly cup with the rose in it. “You kept my rose,” he sounds hopeful now, like he didn’t believe Aleks would have kept it, but most of all : “in your bedroom,” as if it means something he doesn’t understand fully.

Aleks turns around then, fueled by that observation, making James’ hands drop by his side. They look at each other : first in the eyes, a kind of silent talk they are good at, with all these years practicing it. But then they just detail their faces, noses, cheeks, lips...like it’s the first time. James gets closer, his mouth an inch away from Aleks’ cheek. He freezes right before backing up, sighing in frustration. Aleks could feel the sigh more than he heard it and he wonders why James even sighed in the first place. He gets his answer right away : “It’d be so much easier if you were a girl, fuck…”

“What’s the problem ?” Aleks asks then, huffing a laugh, just a little bit hurt and anxious. They kissed in his kitchen, so what’s the deal there ? He doesn’t want James to leave, hopes he doesn’t already have regrets. 

“I don’t know how that work...What do I do ?!” He sounds frustrated, at best, starting to get loud. As if there’s a secret to this !

“Dude, chill out, you're just new to that gay shit.” Aleks voluntary sounds bratty, thinking that’s the best kind of character he should be. “But hey, told you I’d teach you, right ? You know me, I’m good at that. Sucking dicks and all, you can even say that I’m a natural,” he finishes with his damn signature smile, too confident and flirty.

It’s a bit too much fuckboy for James who closes his eyes, harshly brushing his fingers against his eyelids, sighing before he opens them again. He looks straight into Aleks’ eyes, dark and serious. “Drop the act, I know when you act, this isn’t a bit, Aleksandr.”

That shakes the smile off of Aleks’ face. What is he supposed to do then ? He plays roles to get confidence over himself. He does that as an habit, when he gets with guys too, because it’s so easy to pretend you know what is going on, to demand. He just looks confident and lets people get their way with him. Now he doesn’t know what to do, feels like he’d either be too bratty for James or.. too “weak” and emotional. He shakes his head, looking at the floor now, a new smile replaced the falsely confident one with a broken one, hurt. It’s a look they also are too familiar with.

“Hey” James grimaces, realizing his douchery and softening with a low voice. It isn’t at all like he acts when filming, but not quite like he usually is behind the scenes either. There is a softness Aleks isn’t familiar with. “Hey” that one was whispered, closer, their foreheads touching. There is regrets in James’ actions, he’s sorry, his anxiety took the best of him for a brief moment.

If there is no special formula for this, he’ll have to go with his guts. So, James finishes what he started earlier, kissing Aleks’ cheek. It’s more a ghost of a kiss with a lot of beard brushing his skin than anything else but it’s really soft. “Is...this okay ?” he asks, and can only feel Aleks nodding slightly under his lips. So he puts his hands on each sides of Aleks’ face, cupping his cheeks. He is definitely sweating and shaking and he’s not as delicate as Aleks is, but tries his actual best.

Aleks turns his head slightly, and their mouths align. They barely touch each other’s lips, breathing open mouth, eyes closed, trying to understand the moment.

Their faces are so red, so hot, they could pull a joke or anything shitty on the other, like they are used to, but they don’t. James is leading the way, sealing their lips once again and it isn’t like earlier : it’s less desperate but definitely hotter, deeper and slower. The way James is holding Aleks’ face gets slowly overwhelming. But after a nervous chuckle, James breaks the kiss, whispering “you didn’t shave, it tickles, it’s so fucking weird, I didn’t notice it before.”

It is Aleks’ turn to chuckle, his chest heavy with a mix of emotion he doesn’t even want to put a name on. “Dude, you are so new to this,” he says with a smile getting a “fuck off” draped in a smile in response. But Aleks is not done talking, he wants to ask what James wants to do next, if he even wants to do anything, but James beats him to it, asking him these exact questions at the same time. “You first, you are new after all,” Aleks offers, trying to look at James’ face but being too close to see anything.

“I honestly don’t fucking know” is the most honest answer James could give, but he still give a thought about it, bites his bottom lip, moves back a little to look at him better. It’s still the same guy he knows, that little shit face, it’s just so strange at that point. “I mean.. I want to touch you ?” He flushes to a darker shade of red as he understands his own words. “Not like-” he takes his hands off Aleks to motion towards his dick, laughing awkwardly. “Not especially there, not…Now ? I mean, just touching...You.”

Aleks smiles, a wide and pure smile that forms a laugh, his hands squeezing James’ forearms, and muttering an ‘okay’, unmoving, perhaps waiting for more words.

“Maybe, like-” James’ eyes darts to Aleks’ bed, still messy from the previous night. “I mean-”

Aleks just nods, quickly moves away to make his bed look better. As he does so, flattening his blanket and placing his pillows at their place, he’s nervous but also expecting. His guts twist as he turns his back on James to close the blinds until the mood gets really intimate. 

This is it, right ? It’s going to happen, whatever the “it” really means.

After a quick exhale and a weird impulse move, Aleks starts taking his shirt off. James should be used to that since he does it all the damn time ! Well, when he turns around, he gets to see James biting his lips and looking at him up and down, trying so little to be discreet about it.

“Uh…” Aleks passes a hand on his neck, back to nervous now as he also points to the bed with his finger. “Want me to-”

“Lie there ?” is a quick demand meant to sound like a question.

“Okay.” Aleks keeps his adidas sweatpants on and his socks and takes two steps until his knees touch the bed. He’s about to kneel on it but James takes a couple of step in a heartbeat and lays one hand on Aleks’ shoulder, “Wait ! Wait-”.

Aleks turns around, a bit startled, but then James pushes him hard, making him fall, back first, onto the bed. It is not too gracefully and takes the air off his lungs by surprise. “I always wanted to do that,” James adds, a smile on his face, just a bit mischievous. Aleks brushes his finger through his hair, recollecting himself quickly and licking his lips before crawling on his back until his full body gets on the mattress.

He feels a bit weird, exposed to James’ gaze, for his gaze, and he’s not too used to that. No one-night-stand he had before can compare to now, the look on James’ face, the weird intimacy laced with discomfort, the slow desire despite knowing each other so well on day to day and wanting to slap the other occasionally because they can be too annoying.

“James ?” Aleks feels a bit too self conscious about the softness of his body. James’ intense look on his stomach makes him a bit uncomfortable. “James, stop,” he pleads.

James stops, looking at Aleks’ face instead. “Sorry”, is mumbled as he shrugs like it’s nothing but gets closer to the bed. He kicks his shoes off but that’s it, he stands there, not knowing how he wants to be on the bed. “Dude,” he says in clear loss, and that makes Aleks laugh, because James has too much going in his head, he doesn’t go with the flow right now.

“You can just… Sit on my lap, if you want, I don’t care,” Aleks offers, seducing. After the intense defying look James gives him he adds “Actually I care a lot, I’m probably going to bust a nut sooner than expected, but that’s cool, right ?”

James sounds irritated by the joke but still smiles, putting one knee on the mattress. He hesitates another second, looking at the blanket for any clue of what he could do before his mind just goes with “fuck it”. With one quick and graceless move, he straddles Aleks’ legs, not quite sitting on them. The bed barely complains about it.

“Oh shit,” Aleks already feels out of breath, his eyes wide. He can’t keep his hands to himself and puts them on James’ thighs, already knowing he’ll feel nothing since the guy is wearing his eternal jeans but, hey…It’s still him, it’s new and exciting.

“Stop doing that !” James complains, almost whiny, slapping Aleks’ hands away. “Or I’ll tie your hands.” It doesn’t have any bite to it, he even smiles wilder. He’s embarrassed by himself and that’s just really cute.

“What, you tie up people ? You’re kinky, James” there’s a shit-eating-grin on Aleks’ face, a bit more relaxed now that James is also in a position of weakness, just a bit, because he’s actually so nervous he could implode.

“I dont- ! Well, I did, maybe once.” James confesses, regretting it because of the look Aleks gives him. “And I’m usually not on top-” He realizes his words and curses, blushing more, “No, Fuck off I don’t mean- Stop smiling ! I’m gonna put a bag on your face !”

Aleks is laughing hard, hiding his face in his hand until he calms down a bit. But when his laugh dies out and he puts his hands down, he just sees James gaze on him, the warmth it gives him. He’d do anything for him. “If it’s your jam, really, you can tie me up and like, blindfold me, I don't know.” He’s not too confident about losing a sense and being at the mercy of someone, but he’s ready to try. “I just really need you to promise not to be a dick if we do that.”

James blinks and gives him a look like he just said something absolutely stupid. “Really ?” he asks, and Aleks nods, serious, before turning his head to see where his pillows are, grabbing them, taking the cases off before giving them to James. James looks at Aleks once more, taking the fabric, playing with it, not too sure yet. The question is repeated, silently, and the answer is just as silent, a nod with dark eyes.

Before James gets to do anything, Aleks asks one last, simple but serious, question “Promise me you won’t be an asshole.” James simply answers “I won’t, I fucking won’t, I promise” to what Aleks just sighs, because in front of a camera it might be a lie, but he still trusts him in that specific setting. “Go on, then.”

It’s weird but they did this in other settings before, so James ties Aleks’ hands together, at first a bit too tight, receiving a complaint. He loosens the knot a bit to make it easier to get free of it. It really puts more heat to the room as Aleks has his arms above his head, doing his best to keep calm. James looks at him, the way his pulse can be seen under the skin of his throat, the rise and fall of his chest, the small but still unsure smile, all at his mercy and looking so good...The sight does something to James, making him hums in appreciation as he leans, hands on the mattress, barely hesitating now before kissing him.

It’s slow and deep like before, and Aleks even tries to move his hips into it but James prevents him from doing so by weighting down, trapping him. It’s pleasing and overwhelming, all at once. Aleks doesn’t whines to complain when James breaks the kiss, no sir, absolutely not. He also doesn’t feel like his face is burning at the smile James gives him in reaction to it. God, he’s gorgeous, Aleks never wants to stop looking at him. Except that he does, because James then blindfolds him.

Aleks immediately tries to breathe slowly, to calm himself. He isn’t too confident right now, he gave too much power to James, as if it’s not the same scenario playing on loop since years.

Soft hands touch his cheeks in the sudden, making him jump slightly. James appeases him by whispering calming words as if he’s doing an ASMR video and it should be weird, it should. He believes those words and feels himself relax enough not to slide into a panic attack as he focuses on the sensations then, feeling fingers trailing on his skin and ghost above his throat, chest, stomach and then...the hands are flat on his skin. It makes him squirm, he becomes noisy without wanting to. God, James is touching his stomach, caressing the soft skin with more care that Aleks thought he was able to, hands going up once again, almost cupping his chest. Aleks tries not to arch but he does it slightly and hears a hum from James, deep, aroused and arousing. That whole moment is surreal, James is touching him, exploring his chest before he goes down again, scratching slightly where he can, like a sensual massage.

Aleks would kill to see, tries his best not to lose his mind and stay calm, to not talk his nervosity away in fear to ruin the moment. He still makes sounds, lots of them, small whimpers of frustration and a bit of something else, as James’ hands travel up once again. The hands are so soft and warm. Aleks is still a bit afraid of any pranks or bullshit, but James promised, yes he promised, he’s touching him right now.

It’s overwhelming.

It's still so weird and Aleks is still tense, despite everything, but James isn’t much better, looking down to his hands resting on Aleks’ soft tummy. His mind isn’t clearly there, it’s like a weird lucid dream he’s having. He pinches a bit of fat, gently, and Aleks squirms again, tries to move away, genuinely upset this time, saying “Stop” as a true warning. 

James obeys, hands up even if Aleks can’t see them. “Sorry, it wasn’t- I wasn’t making fun of it, I just…” He doesn’t know how to word it so he keeps it silent.

It doesn’t mean he’s done touching, he is just carefully avoiding the softest part of Aleks’ stomach, but he also discovers the silky touch of his hips exposed above his pants. “You’re so soft,” he hears himself say and he feels bad for saying it but Aleks doesn’t say a word, just lets himself be caressed by the curious hands.

James’ mind wanders and wonders for a second if he should ask Aleks for permission to do more, but decides to try without it, already ready to stop in case of rejection. He lowers his head again, his weight moving the mattress and Aleks under him who is probably bracing himself for anything now. He wasn’t expecting the ghost of a kiss just above one of his nipples, gasping at the sensation. The weird brush of the beard is really not something he is familiar with, and he can only save it in his brain as James does it again.

James is following the ink with soft kisses and the slow burn of his beard trailing on the soft skin. He’s enjoying Aleks’ small noises, sounding like he’s in pain but really being just embarrassed. James’ mischief wants to take a step further and he just gives in, suddenly licking the skin. He doesn’t even try to keep his own voice low as he moans, so low.

Aleks arches his body as much as he can, almost screaming “Fuck, James!” between his gritted teeth. He needs all his strength to not take the knot off his hands. It’s too much for him. It’d have been too much with a stranger but that’s 10 times worse with James. He wants more and is about to voice it when James just decides not only to take another step further but run up the stairs at this point !

His beard was scratching the sensitive area around Aleks’ nipple, and then a kiss with soft wet lips happened. All right, but now another step is added to it as one hand squeezes the softness and James’ lips close around it, sucking and licking without any restrain. Surprised, overwhelmed, Aleks lets out a broken and pitchy whine, way too close to the pained scream he once made when pepper-sprayed, delivering his hands from the loose knot to bury his fingers in James’ hair, untying the bun in the process, not caring about anything else but the sensations. 

James pushes harder on Aleks, fingers digging in the pale flesh, his tongue abusing the poor nipple. He loves this, they both do. He pulls out suddenly, making his lips pop off the skin and they are both breathless. The warm air against the wet spot is just… Aleks can’t handle it.

He even keeps his eyes closed a bit longer, even when James takes the blindfold off. And when their eyes finally meet it’s just better than they both imagined.

Aleks’ arms drop to his side. He doesn’t have the energy to keep them up, he is breathless, red, looking in pain but his dark pupils tell the truth. He is defeated, at James’ mercy without question now. And James, that beautiful son of a bitch, looks so good with his hair undone, but the red lips and the fine line of spit linking him to Aleks’ nipple is pure indecency.

“Fuck, James, you’re going to kill me, give me a second” Aleks pleads, as he approaches his hands closer to James’ thighs, waiting for a green light to change the flow.

James just sits up and waits, needing the change too, arms along his body, the spit link now broken but still dangling off his lip, his hair just majestic. Aleks slowly goes up, until his hands stop at the rim of James’ shirt. There, he puts one hand flat against the fabric as the other slides under it, slowly. He keeps looking at James for any indication that he went too far, still unbelieving it’s even happening.

In a way, he still isn’t the one in control.

There’s hair under his fingertips that he never dreamed to touch or see more than a glimpse of. His skin is burning hot, his muscles contracting under the fingers. Aleks would love him to take his shirt off but doesn’t know if it’s alright with him, he’s so self conscious…He tentatively grabs the rim of the shirt, looking deep in James’ eyes, asking for permission. James is deep in thoughts, really looking for the right answer, but the fondness and pure adoration in Aleks’ eyes gets to him. He exhales and nods, gives him the green light to do as he wants.

In fact, Aleks moves a little until he’s sitting on the bed. James and him have their feet touching, and Aleks could lean his head to rest it on James’ stomach so easily... Aleks gets back to James’ shirt, still not looking away from his eyes. He’s focused on them even when the shirt is lifted above his tummy, because if he fucks this up, it can be bad. Or so he thinks.

James exhales slowly, focused. He decides to take his own shirt off fully, a bit too aggressive, exposing himself. He throws the shirt on the floor without looking. His eyes dare Aleks to say anything about him as he gets tense. He’s still soft looking and doesn’t really like it, but Aleks’ gaze goes down on him, and he looks blessed, his hands barely brushing the skin like it’s pure gold. James closes his eyes, focusing on the sensations and boy, he really wasn’t expecting a kiss on his stomach, at all.

At first, James tries to be unbothered by it, but Aleks is so affectionate it’s hard to ignore. The touch is delicate, the kisses he peppers are pure adoration. James whines, not knowing where to put his hands, until he hears a muffled moan from Aleks. He opens his eyes and looks down where Aleks keeps kissing his skin. 

In a sudden urge, he grabs Aleks’ hands and forces them above his head. The look Aleks gives him sends a wave of warmth into his groin and he pushes hard on Aleks to make him fall on his back as himself almost crashes on him. No words, just gazes and heavy breathing before James lowers himself until their chests touch, so warm. Aleks arches his body, brushing as much as he can while still having his arms restrained.

It surprises him greatly when James moves his knees to get in between his legs, even making him spread. It feels like he has done it before, and that sends a shiver to his full body. That simple shiver ignites James who brushes his crotch hard onto Aleks. It’s not comfortable but it still feels amazing, because it’s...them. 

Aleks tries to get James to join hands, moving his fingers until James understands, but he is yet unsuccessful. “Is that what-” Aleks starts, breathless, pausing to lick his lips,”is that what you pictured when you decided to bring me roses ?”

James laughs, looking a bit playful, forcing an arch out of Aleks without any shame. He tries to adjust his position as his jeans get uncomfortable. “Not exactly,” sounds so strange and so James at the same time, malice in his voice.

“Tell me.” Aleks is a bit too far gone, he isn’t drunk but feels like it again. There’s a hint of anxiety somewhere, but it’s mostly drowned in a cloud of good feelings.

“You really want to know ?” There is a pure mischievous smile on his face, red as it can get. Aleks licks his lips, nodding slowly. James laughs again, as if he finds himself ridiculous. He looks so good, his hair dangling on each side of his face, like a damn renaissance sculpture. “I couldn’t just...Stop on one thing,” he starts, looking away from Aleks’ face, embarrassed. “I’m not a romantic like you.”

James’ grasp gets more firm and that gets a moan out of Aleks who just accepts being at James’ mercy now. Hell, he accepted that since day one. He might have been a little asshole fighting against some of James’ decisions and actions, but he mostly just followed him anyways, he loves it.

“Tell me, James” Aleks wants to hear everything, even if it’s just pure filth. He doesn’t look for anything romantic at the moment, at all. The roses were somehow enough. He wants to know what James was thinking about him, in which scenario he pictured him. He just wants to know how he is seen or fantasised by him.

James sighs, he hoped Aleks would just let go of it and roll with the moment. He can lie, but it’s more fun to be honest, just because he can already imagine Aleks’ face when he’ll say it. He looks up to Aleks’ eyes, and he knows how much he has seen them in all kinds of emotions and settings. He’s sure he even saw some of these looks he’s giving him right now.

“It’s not something I can pull off, but I still-” He licks his own lips and sees Aleks’ eyes break gaze with him just to watch them. “I don’t know, I just pictured us kissing and me pushing you against a wall or something and fucking you on a kitchen counter.”

That makes Aleks laughs, his kitchen counters are impractical and he can’t picture James lifting him, but that still tempting. “I don’t think we can do that…” He wraps his legs around James, getting a “hunf” in response, perfect. “But we can do something else.”

James lowers his head, gets his mouth painfully close to Aleks’ ear, moisturizing his lips and knowing how Aleks gets bothered by the sound. “Show me,” is pure hotness, the tone pushes any humor away, replaces it with butterflies made of lust in the pit of Aleks’ stomach.

“James, shit, James-” He whines despites trying not to, tries to grind against the other, would pay to ride his dick on the spot, if he’s being honest with himself. “I wish I could give you the full panel right now, trust me, I want it, but I can’t-” 

He stops because James is lacing their fingers together and that just is too much for him to handle. He loves him and hates him all at once when there’s the beard scratching his jaw, soft nibbling on his ear and a low humming. James is just indecent, he loves making these sounds and that goes right to Aleks’ dick, and that since day one. Then it was a joke, now...Now it is so good.

“James, let me suck your dick or something, you fucking bitch” It would have been effective if his voice didn’t crack and if he avoided moaning.

“You would ? I thought you didn’t like shit on your face.” James has a devilish grin, still nibbling Aleks’ ear without a care in the world, too happy to torture him even in his own bed. His smiles gets bigger as Aleks sighs.

“Okay, two things you have to know about me,” He inhales and gets ready to say it all in one go and if possible without fucking up. “I love sucking dicks and the secret to avoid cum on your face is to swallow it, everyone knows that !”

That just does it for James, making him groan. He doesn’t voice yet how he pictures Aleks drooling, a bit teary, with cum on his chin, looking perfectly disheveled and sweaty. James never even once tried to hide how he loves things messy and he knows how Aleks’ gag reflex is a joke.

James just lets himself flop on the side, releasing Aleks’ hands and brushing his fingers along the soft side before pulling hard on his waist to make them face each other.

It’s a sight they are used to, with conventions and trips, they shared beds multiple times. It could have happened before, no doubts. The kiss following is softer than expected, their hands exploring each chest. It stops in a laugh when James cups the soft fat around Aleks’ nipple once again.

“What is it with you and my tits ?” Aleks wants to sound irritated but he’s barely even trying, whispering against the lips, appreciating the touch of the long fingers.

“I love them,” is all James offers as an explanation as he brushes a thumb over the nipple, getting a soft sound from Aleks, making him smile.

“Okay, okay, stop, part two,” Aleks hurries just because he knows he’s going to die soon if he doesn’t. 

There is no more soft kisses or touch as Aleks gets on his knees, looking down at James with a teasing look, all worries out, replaced by a need to please. James looks relaxed, smiling and waiting, a sight to live for.

Aleks combs his hair with his fingers just enough time to gather himself before he opens James’ belt, button and fly in a record time. He is done playing around, pulling the pants down along with James’ ridiculous underwear with a bit of help. After a quick look to the already painfully hard dick, Aleks leans and looks up at James, teasing him with a cocky smile and a shaky breath. He sees James skipping a beat when he licks his lips, puts his hands on James’ hips and lower his head.

There is a long lick from base to tip making James shake and groan, hands already finding their place in Aleks’ hair. It’s only teasing but that’s a lot to take for James who just can’t keep his voice down. He watches as Aleks keeps on doing the same thing on purpose for what seems a long moment suspended in time.

James’ mouth does an O shape and air gets kicked out of his lungs when Aleks generously sucks on the tip, humming around him and looking at him with hooded eyes. He’s gorgeous, good at what he’s doing and James lets an embarrassing whimper escape his mouth before words spill out, low and praising, encouraging, all jokes forgotten. God, Aleks is just perfect, looking so good like that, focused, doing his best and already drooling out the corner of his mouth and adding one hand to do what his mouth can’t.

“So good, yes, just like that, Aleks- Aleksandr-” The name is laced with a tone Aleks never quite heard from James before, even when he acted all kind of filthy talk for his videos. It made him buck his hips, not relieving any tension in his pants, but still pleasing enough for now.

Really, at that point Aleks is only doing anything to please James, and by extend it pleases him too. James is massaging his scalp, only tugging a little on long locks when his body shakes. 

James really tries hard to keep his eyes open, not wanting to miss a second of the action. Aleks has one hand securing James from trusting and hurting him, but the other is now doing an expert job at both pumping James’ dick and occasionally massaging his balls. His touch is so soft and perfect, James really just praises him for that out loud, getting the bleached man to pop his mouth off his dick to smile, his eyes so soft, satisfied. Perfect.

James fights against himself to get a kiss, wanting the good mouth on him again, feeling the heat build up, knowing fully that he is close. He just frowns and tries to explain in quick words that he wants Aleks to come closer, so he can touch him. With awkward moves, and with his mouth not leaving his job, Aleks does his best to comply.

That’s when James’ hands leave the bleached hair to tug on Aleks’ sweatpants, revealing cute printed underwear. Aleks loses a bit of focus as a hand goes touching his butt cheeks, grabbing the flesh and smacking, making him groan at the boldness. He still has underwear on, sure, but that is still just too much for him. 

Aleks is his first guy and that isn’t to be taken lightly. A quick look to James just sends a wave of warmth through his whole body. James looks both so curious and excited to see something as intimate as another guy’s (his friend) dick twitch. When he sees James’ tongue poking out of his mouth, hungry and his eyes so dark, Aleks gathers enough strength to try to get as much dick in his mouth as he can.

The events then just went out of control, really quickly. James boldly got his hands under Aleks’ underwear, curiously touching with his fingertips, close to his ass, then close to his dick. It’s the touch of someone not used to it but eager to try, like every inch of skin he touches burn him. It’s too much at once and Aleks comes right there, in his underwears, shaking and groaning as his hips buck. He coughs and drools around James’ length, gagging when James can’t control the force of his own thrust.

James’ fingers dig hard in Aleks’ soft buttcheek, but he keeps his eyes open to see the bleached man catches his breath, looking like a beautiful mess. They share one look and James is on the no return road, whimpering at Aleks’ smile hanging between bliss and slight pain.

One word, his name, said with the softest and most broken voice, is just enough to make Aleks suck again, swirling his tongue and bobbing his pretty face, all energy gathered for this last part. James’ cry is silent, air knocked off him as he tries to arch but gets stopped by a strong hand. He looks down and sees the focus on Aleks’ face as he swallows everything he has to offer, giving him the urge to kiss him.

His hands find the soft hair easily and he yanks on them, receiving a cry from Aleks which isn’t even half pain. He pulls him up, graceless moves and exhausted breaths, until their mouths align. James licks, bites, gets the last of his strength into that kiss, tasting himself on Aleks’ tongue and groaning because of it. Aleks is soft above him, tired but content, a laugh escaping his mouth, swallowed by James.

When the kiss finally ends, Aleks lets himself flops on top of James, too tired to really care now. James doesn’t say a word about it anyways, his long fingers caressing the soft pale skin, despite the sweat covering it. They have their eyes closed, recollecting themselves and James realizes that Aleks is drifting to sleep, letting him do that without stopping his sweet touch. He must be exhausted from the party, the sex and the emotional rollercoaster of these last days. 

James isn’t a monster. He even takes that time to think, question himself, realize fully what situation he’s in. He loves that man softly breathing on him, loves his stupid humor, his antics, his skin, how he sounds when he-...

He shakes his head and search for his phone but it’s in his jeans pocket somewhere on the floor. He regrets not having his phone with him for two reasons : taking pictures of the soft features Aleks is displaying, and ordering food for them to share. He settles and waits then, hoping Aleks will not regret this, holding him dearly and not about to even say that out loud anytime soon.

Shortly after, Aleks shakes himself awake, a bit cold, yawning and brushing the torso under him before he just gets back to the reality. He jumps then and detaches himself from James, looking at him with doubt in his eyes.

“Rested well ?” James asks with a smile and Aleks looks at him like he has two heads. Anxiety slowly takes place in James’ throat. “You’re okay ?”

Aleks nods, his hands carefully touching James’ torso again, poking as to be sure it’s real. He goes up to his neck, his jaw… He’s allowed, not rejected, that’s good. “You-” he clears his voice, not quite looking at his eyes yet. “You enjoyed it ?”

James rolls his eyes and yanks on Aleks’ arms to have him flat on him again. Then he takes his head in between his hands, looking at him in the eyes, all serious. He opens his mouth but closes it just as fast, thinking about his words. Sometimes they aren’t easy to find.

“Aleks-” a fond smile replaces his seriousness. “Aleksandr,” a quick silence, “Would you like to eat ? I want chinese, I pay.” That makes Aleks laugh, beautifully so, his eyes closed, relieved and amused. James gets closer, his lips touching Aleks’ ear. “Maybe a shower in the meantime-” he doesn’t say ‘together’, but means it, licking the ear and humming into it, making Aleks shivers at the attention. “And then…” James deliberately lets a moment of silence in between his words, for dramatic effect. “Then, part 3, my turn” Aleks does everything but groans at this.

When James stands a little after, looking for his phone, Aleks looks at the rose in the squiggly cup, silently thanking his mind for buying that single rose and following the game.

He sighs as James sits on the bed to lazily look through food delivery. He touches the naked back he only dreamed to see, hands going up on it to rest on James’ arms, wanting to stay close and curiously looking above his shoulder, his chin resting there.

It’s strange and so blessed to be allowed so much from James, and Aleks pushes a bit further with a kiss at the crook of his neck. The whinny “Stoop !” he gets from it makes him laugh, and his attention then goes on the menu James is selecting.

Somehow it’s just the same, going easy. They are just the same, the only change was a single rose, really.


End file.
